Lesbian

Alicia Foster

**Lesbian**

**Lesbian**

“Lesbian” is one of the oldest and most positive terms that labels the affectional or sexual preference or orientation of women towards other women. A lesbian is a woman who forms her primary loving and sexual relationships with other women; a woman who has a continuing affectional, emotional, romantic, and/or erotic preference for someone of the same sex (UIS Safe Zone: Definitions).

**Origin of Lesbianism**

An early Greek poet, Sappho (e.g., Figure 1), has long been considered bisexual because she wrote love poems addressed to both women and men. The word “lesbian” derives from the name of the island of her birth, Lesbos, where female homosexuality was common; her name is also the origin of its less common synonym “Sapphic” (Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia, 2010).

**Sexual Development**

Sexual development, which usually occurs during adolescence, is a crucial time in a lesbian’s life. Coleman (as cited in Bond, Hefner & Drogos, 2009) explains that w hen individuals realize they primarily have sexual feelings for the same sex, the first two stages of this process, the pre-coming out stage and the coming-out stage, can be vital to successful integration of sexuality into individuals’ everyday lives. During the pre-coming out stage, individuals wrestle with the realization of their sexuality, struggle with the decision to tell others about it, and routinely seek information related to their sexuality. During the coming-out stage, they begin to tell others about their sexuality (2009).

Moreover, Pilkington and D’Augelli (as cited in Bond, Hefner & Drogos, 2009) found that lesbian adolescents’ awareness of social norms vilifying their attraction to same-sex individuals may lead many to suppress their sexual identity from their established peer networks for fear of being ostracized. In other words, the coming-out stage may be as stressful for some lesbians as the pre-coming out stage because of fear of non-acceptance from the people who are important to them.

In D’Augelli, Hershberger & Pilkington’s study (as cited in Soliz et al., 2010) of gay and lesbian youth who had disclosed sexual identity to their parents, approximately one half of mothers and siblings were understanding, and less than one fourth of the fathers were accepting. Hence, this uneasiness and lack of acceptance can put a significant strain on the relationship among family members.

Furthermore, many lesbians avoid revealing their sexual identity because they fear rejection or strain on their interactions and are concerned that stereotypes surrounding sexual identity will change their established relationships. Not disclosing one’s sexual identity may lead to avoiding interactions overall, even with family members. Unfortunately, Kourany (as cited in Soliz et al., 2010) states that such a breakdown in family relationships is linked to a greater risk of social isolation, depression, and suicide among lesbians and other homosexual individuals.

**Effects of Media**

Discovering information about homosexuality may seem stigmatized and frightening to adolescents, but turning to the seemingly anonymous nature of media may prove to be the best alternative to face-to-face interpersonal communication (Bond, Hefner & Drogos, 2009).

Homosexuality is rarely addressed on television, but it is addressed more and more often; however, a person practically has to search for homosexuality in the media, while heterosexual sex is being addressed in almost every aspect of today’s mediated environment. For adolescents who are discovering their sexuality in a technologically saturated society, the media might help them quell the need to disclose sexuality to family members (2009).

**Relationships**

In an unpublished 12-year longitudinal study of same-sex and opposite-sex couples, Gottman and Levenson (as cited in Boon & Alderson, 2009) found several strengths in same-sex relationships, including the finding that women are more expressive in relationships and that both gay and lesbian couples use fewer controlling or hostile emotional tactics during times of conflict. These researchers also found that same-sex couples used more affection and humor in times of conflict and had more ability to soothe each other.

Also, Kurdek (as cited in Boon & Alderson, 2009) found that the relationships between heterosexual, gay, and lesbian cohabiting couples work in similar ways, while this author's most recent 10-year longitudinal study found that cohabiting lesbians had the highest relationship quality compared to gay and heterosexual cohabiting couples. In other words, lesbian couples that live together seem to have the highest quality relationships compared to couples of other sexual orientations.

Finally, lesbian identity management is commonly referred to as the "coming out process". It is an ongoing process of self-disclosure that occurs over the lifespan. Divergent views with regard to the significance of coming out for relationships are evident in the literature (Boon & Alderson, 2009). Beals & Peplau (as cited in Boon & Alderson, 2009) suggest that most researchers have advanced the notion that openness about sexual orientation is healthy and self-affirmative for individuals and their relationships. In other words, remaining closeted may hinder a couple’s relationship.

**Sexual Health Information**

The idea that lesbians are unlikely to acquire an STI is somewhat contradictory to recent reports, which indicate that women who have never had sexual intercourse with men may still be at risk of acquiring a range of common STIs. Moreover, women who identify as lesbian are likely to have had previous sexual relationships with men, meaning their lifetime risk for STIs is similar to that of heterosexual women (Diamant, Schuster and Lever 2000, Skinner et al. 1996 as cited in Carr et al., 2009).

In Carr et al.’s (2009) study, several of the lesbian women interviewed reported being told by their doctors that they did not need Pap testing. A low sense of vulnerability to STIs, such as HPV, among non-heterosexual women was a theme that emerged consistently throughout the in-depth interviews. The belief that sex between women is inherently safe sex due to minimal transmission of body fluids is most likely the reason why lesbians, and many physicians, believe they are at very low risk of contracting STIs.

Moreover, there is a tendency to view lesbian sex as safe due to limited transfer of body fluids. While people understand how STIs are transmitted via penetrative sex with a penis, people find it difficult to conceive how STIs can be transmitted between women. This is possibly indicative of uncertainty regarding how skin-to-skin transmission and transfer of infection via vaginal and cervical fluids may occur (Carr et al., 2009). Also, non-heterosexual women may make decisions about their risk of acquiring STIs on the basis of their partner’s sexual history. A woman who has never slept with men would often be considered less likely to have an STI than a woman who has previous male partners (2009).

 One tool for safer sex that seems to be unclear for lesbians is dental dams (i.e., thin squares of latex rubber or silicone). Dental dams (e.g., Figure 2) are often promoted to lesbians as a way to ensure safer oral sex; however, dams are not routinely promoted to heterosexual couples for oral sex, making lesbians cynical about their value in protecting against STIs (Carr et al., 2009). Lesbian women are clearly at risk for STIs, yet they are confused about how to protect themselves and their partners from STIs. To clear up any confusion, resources should be explicit and detailed about sexual activities, while clearly explaining how STIs may be transmitted between women.

A final barrier in safe sexual health for lesbian is that physicians have been found to be uncomfortable with sexuality and with homosexuality, and as a result, lesbians may not always disclose their sexual orientation or details of their sexual behavior to their physicians (Klitzman & Greenberg 2002). This is most likely due to issues of self-acceptance, fears of the doctor’s reactions, and fears of receiving inferior care if a lesbian decides to disclose her homosexuality to her physician. In Stevens & Hall’s study (cited in Klitzman & Greenberg 2002), among lesbians, 40% fear receiving inferior health care from providers if they disclose their HIV status, 84% find providers “nonempathetic,” and 96% imagine their care would be less if they disclosed. It is important to keep in mind, however, that this study was done nearly ten years ago and lesbians may be more comfortable with disclosing and trusting their physicians with information about their homosexuality, today.

 References

Bond, B. J., Hefner, V., & Drogos, K. L. (2009). Information-Seeking Practices during the Sexual Development of Lesbian, Gay,and Bisexual Individuals: The Influence and Effects of Coming Out in a Mediated Environment. //Sexuality & Culture//, 13:32-50.

Boon, S. L., & Alderson, K. G. (2009). A phenomenological study of women in same-sex relationships who were previously married to men. //The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality//, 149-168.

Carr, S., McNair, R., & Power, J. (2009). Absent sexual scripts: lesbian and bisexual women's knowledge, attitudes and action regarding safer sex and sexual health information. //Culture, Health & Sexuality//, 67-81.

Klitzman, R. L., & Greenberg, J. D. (2002). Patterns of Communication Between Gay and Lesbian Patients and Their Health Care Providers. //Journal of Homosexuality//, 65-75.

Soliz, J., Ribarsky, E., Harrigan, M. M., & Tye-Williams, S. (2010). Perceptions of Communication With Gay and Lesbian Family Members: Predictors of Relational Satisfaction and Implications of Outgroup Attitudes. //Communication Quarterly//, 77-95.

//UIS Safe Zone: Definitions//. (n.d.). Retrieved April 10, 2011, from Terms Commonly Associated with the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Communities: http://www.uis.edu/studentaffairs/safezone/resources/documents/Definitions.pdf

//Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia//. (2010, December 9). Retrieved April 10, 2011, from History of Lesbianism: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_lesbianism