Sexual+Satisfaction

Marissa Mykines **Sexual Satisfaction ** **Sexual Satisfaction Defined ** Sexual is defined by Webster’s dictionary as occurring between or involving the sexes: sexual relations. Satisfaction is defined as a fulfillment of a need or want. Sexual satisfaction is both related to the physical and emotional aspects of a relationship and how they are communicated in order to increase sexual satisfaction between both partners. Communication about sexual needs and wants is very important to achieve high levels of sexual satisfaction. **Communication ** According to (MacNeil & Byers, 2005) the proposed pathways include both expressive and instrumental; both have positive effects and have helped to increase sexual satisfaction for both men and women. “Intimate communication is important to the development and maintenance of satisfying sexual relationships” (MacNeil & Byers, 2005). Based on the proposed instrumental pathway and criteria to establish mediation the following predictions were made (Barron & Kenny, 1986). 1. Greater sexual self-disclosure would be associated with greater partner understanding of rewards and costs, a more favorable balance of sexual exchanges (rewards and costs), and greater sexual satisfaction. 2. Greater understanding of rewards and costs would be associated with a more favorable balance of sexual exchanges, and greater sexual satisfaction. 3. A more favorable balance of sexual exchanges would be associated with greater sexual satisfaction. 4. Partner understanding and the balance of sexual self-disclosure and sexual satisfaction. Talking about and sharing sexual information regarding satisfaction with a partner is very beneficial to achieving high relational satisfaction. Self-disclosure and sharing intimate details about likes and dislikes especially sexually greatly increases satisfaction between partners. (Biss & Horne, 2005) indicated that living with a partner had a substantial positive impact on sexual satisfaction. Proximity is a huge part of this and helps to increase communication between couples and the more sexually open the couple is the higher the sexual satisfaction is. **Sexual Satisfaction within Relationships ** A commonly used model to evaluate sexual satisfaction in relationships is the Interpersonal Exchange Model of Sexual Satisfaction. It is based on 3 main concepts 1) a balance of sexual rewards and sexual costs, 2) one’s comparison level of sexual re wards relative to one’s comparison level of sexual costs, and 3) the equality of one’s sexual rewards and costs are positively related to one’s sexual satisfaction. These can greatly be affected by gender, age and different orientations. “For example, young adults today remain single longer than young adults in previous generations (Waite & Joyner, 2001). Additionally, coital involvement, once socially restricted to the confines of marriage (Smith, 1994), is now commonly experienced within dating relationships (Laumann, Gagnon, Michael, & Michaels, 1994; U.S. Bureau of Census 2000).” Single women tend to weigh the balance of sexual reward to costs more carefully than single men (Muehlenhard & McCoy, 1991). Single women are at greater risk for incurring sexual costs, such as contracting STD’s, becoming pregnant, and being victims of sexual aggression. They also disclose more about sexual costs than men (MacNeil & Byers, 2005). The association between sexuality and relational experiences is stronger for single women than for single men. They focus on the emotional part of the relationship and the commitment aspect before any encouragement of sexual involvement (Christopher, 2001). Women put more emphasis on the communication aspect of the relationship. They are less concerned with the physical connection and more with the emotional one, at least in the early stages of the relationship. There are also differences in orientations and the stages in life and what the individual is seeking in a relationship and what is of importance to them. “For instance, college students are often focused on mutuality in personal relationships, where there is balance in the relationship (Neff & Harter, 2003), while working class relationships are more likely to be characterized by traditionally-gendered power arrangements.” Sexual satisfaction serves as a mediator to relationship satisfaction (Kisler & Christopher, 2008). This is dependent on many variables and differences in each individual situation. Social exchange variables in singles’ sexual and relational satisfaction are highly important. The association between the balance of sexual rewards and costs and to sexual satisfaction, as well as the association between sexual and relationship satisfaction, are differentially related by gender. (Kisler & Christopher, 2008). In interpersonal relationships “Effective communication about sexuality has been shown to enhance sexual arousal and to be a vital part of the sexual relationship.” (Haavio-Mannila & Kontula, 1997). **Influencers ** Adolescents’ sexual satisfaction refers to the extent to which they are content with their sexual lives. Media affects how relationships are portrayed and what is to be considered normal. “For example, (Kendrick, Gutierres, & Goldberg, 1989) has shown that men who were exposed to Playboy-type centerfolds found their partners less sexually attractive and rated themselves as less in love with them than did men who were exposed to abstract art.” Men see sexual satisfaction as simply physical and becoming conditioned into thinking there is no importance in the emotional connection in a relationship. The social comparison theory refers to “any process in which individuals relate their own characteristics to those of others” (Buunk & Gibbons, 2007, p. 16). Men who are exposed to sexually explicit internet material (SEIM) tend to relate their partners to the things they have seen on the internet (which is usually unrealistic and touched up) and they report less sexual satisfaction in their relationship and with their partners. Adolescents compare their relationships to the ones they see in the media and are forced to make upward comparisons since they ones they are exposed to via the media are often unrealistic. They think of their sexual lives as inferior to the ones they see in the media and sometimes develop increased sexual dissatisfaction. Sexual experience, perceived peer norms, and gender all play a role in the intensity of the effects of SEIM on any particular adolescent. How the media communicates social norms regarding sex has a negative effect on adolescents and creates upward social comparisons that are unrealistic and damaging to adolescents’ perceptions on what is considered normal. The role of your family, your interpersonal relationships, and your relationship with yourself all affect how sexually satisfied you are or can be. Physical affection within the family is related to overall lifetime sexual satisfaction. Communicating uncertainties and making sure you are happy with your sex life is extremely important especially with a significant other. **Women ** <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Women’s sexual dissatisfaction is directly linked with reported relational problems. Women tend to put more emphasis on the emotional aspect while men put more on the physical to communicate this is very important to a having a successful sexual relationship with a partner. “Countering societal messages for women may be the key to increasing their sexual satisfaction.” (Daniluk, 1998). Cultural traditions have created a silence around talk of sex and have a negative impact for women since they need to communicate sex in order to be highly satisfied. Masturbation plays a role in women’s sexual satisfaction in that those who report to have masturbated frequently report higher levels of sexual satisfaction.

**<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">References ** <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Baron, R. M., & Kenny, D. A. (1986). The moderate-mediator variable distinction in social psychology research: Conceptual, strategic, and statistical considerations. //Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 51,// 1173-1182. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Biss, W. J., Horne, S. G. (2005). Sexual satisfaction as more than a gendered concept: The roles of psychological well-being and sexual orientation. //Journal of Constructivist Psychologist, 18,// 25-38. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Buunk, A. P., & Gibbons, F. X. (2007). Social comparison: The end of a theory and the <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">emergence of a field. Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 102, 3–21. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Christopher, F. S., (2001). To dance the dance: A symbolic interactional exploitation of premarital sexuality. //Mahwah, NJ, Lawrence Erlbaum.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Christopher, F. S., & Kisler, T. S., (2004) Exploring marital sexuality: Peeking inside the bedroom and discovering what we don’t know – but should! //The handbook of sexuality in close relationships.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Daniluk, J. C. (1998). //Women’s sexuality across the life span: Challenging// //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">myths, creating meanings //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">. New York: Guilford Press. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Haavio-Mannila, E., & Kontula, O. (1997). Correlates of increased sexual <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">satisfaction//. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 26,// 399–419. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Herbenick, D. (2009). Reading this book just might improve your sexual relationship. //Sexual Information from the Kinsey Insitute.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Kenrick, D. T., Gutierres, S. E., & Goldberg, L. L. (1989). Influence of popular erotica on  <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">judgments of strangers and mates. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 25, 159–167. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Kwajah, J. (2009). Happy moments in your life. //All Voices.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Laumann, E. O., Gagnon, J. H., Michael, R. T., & Michaels S. (1994). The social organization of sexuality: Sexual practices in the United States. //University of Chicago Press.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">MacNeil, S., & Byers, E. S. (2005). Dyadic assessment of sexual self-disclosure and sexual satisfaction in heterosexual dating couples. //Journal of Social and Personal Relationships//, //22//, 169-181 <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">MacNeil, S., Byers, E. S. (2005). The relationships between sexual problems, communication and sexual satisfaction. //Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 6,// 277-283. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> Muehlenhard, C. L., & McCoy, M. L. (1991). Double standard/double bind. //Psychology of// //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Women Quarterly //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">, 15, 447–461. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Neff, K. D., & Harter, S. (2003). Relationship styles of self-focused autonomy, other-focused <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">connectedness, and mutuality across multiple relationship contexts. //Journal of Social and// //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Personal Relationships //<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">, //20//, 81–100. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Sexual Health, Women’s Health. (2009). How women attain sexual satisfaction. //Health, Fitness, Sex and Glamour.// <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;"> Smith, T. W. (1994). Attitudes toward sexual permissiveness: Trends, correlates, and behavioral <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">connections. In A. S. Rossi (Ed.), //Sexuality across the life course// (pp. 63–97). Chicago: The University of Chicago Press. <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Waite, L., Joyner, K. (2001). Emotional satisfaction and physical pleasure in sexual unions: Time horizons, sexual behavior and sexual exclusivity. //Journal of Marriage and Family, 63,// 247-264.